Love, Genoa City Style

The merged Newman Media employee list sets up months' worth of romantic, sexy time triangles for lovers old and new. Have the Newman brothers missed bedding any of the women in town? Yes, but there is still time.

Dear readers, there used to be a TV show called Love, American Style, a comedy show like Love Boat, Fantasy Island, and other anthology comedy series of the time. Every week, there would be different celebrity guest stars with rollicking stories about convoluted romances, misunderstandings, and affairs.

As the employee list of Adustus... no, I mean SNA Media... no, I mean Newman Media, shapes up, it seems like a set-up of Love, Genoa City Style. Adam and Nick have both slept with Sharon and Sally. Nick has slept with Phyllis, so to close the loop in the space-time continuum and save humanity, Adam will have to sleep with Phyllis, so he and his brother have both bedded all the women in their company, except Mariah. I'd like to point out that Nick and Sharon pitched a fit when Adam hired Phyllis and Sally, but no one threw a fit when Sharon hired her daughter Mariah.

If Newman Media merges with SNA, that leaves Audra...where? Audra hasn't slept with Nick or Adam, but I suspect she is about to sleep with Nate. Did you see the look on Elena's face when she spotted Audra and Nate looking cozy at the bar? She knows Nate has scoped out his latest conquest and is about to do to Victoria what he did to her. And sure, Audra is sleeping with Kyle, but I don't think that's a long-lasting romance.

Nikki seems to be the most intelligent person in the Newman family. Nikki has a built-in B.S. detector and doesn't trust Nate or Audra. Nikki can always smell a rat, and after her being right 100 times, you would think her family would take more stock when she cautions them to be careful of someone.

Nate keeps confiding in Audra, and then she runs to Victor with the confidences. Why does Nate keep telling her things? Doesn't he know running to Audra to spill all his secrets is a bad look for a guy who is supposed to be earning Victor, Nikki, and Victoria's trust? I know all the girls are crazy over Nate, but, while he is exceptionally handsome, he's got no pizazz. I would not be interested in Nate at all. But then again, I don't give a rat's ass about money, power, and prestige. I like intelligent, kind nerds with soulful takes on movies, TV, and books.

But I digress. I can't imagine that Love, Genoa City Style doesn't end up in either a gunfight or an orgy. With all those strong personalities in one room, I hope Newman hires a lot of security. Imagine Phyllis and Sally clashing! Imagine Nick and Adam coming to blows when Sally gets all caught up in working with Adam again, and Nick gets jealous! Imagine Adam and Phyllis hitting it off and Nick getting jealous that Adam is about to bed another of his ex-wives! The possibilities are endless.

I am happy for Sharon, though, just to get her out of Crimson Lights and into a storyline again. Sharon Case is too vital to be spending every day making mochas. I like the plot point of Esther being asked to manage Crimson Lights. Ever since the legend Jeanne Cooper passed away, we rarely see her faithful maid/friend Esther. It's fantastic that she's getting some more screentime. But I wish she would have taken Chloe up on her offer to redecorate; I want to eliminate that creepy puppet.

In other Love, Genoa City Style triangles, did you see the stink eye that Heather gave Lily when she spotted Lily and Daniel kissing? Did you see her hiding in the bushes at the restaurant until Lily left so she could get Daniel alone? And then Lily came back, and I laughed out loud. Lily is back, anyway, after you ducked down in the potted plants, waiting to make your move!

Don't get me wrong, I like Heather and am glad she and Lucy are back, but I don't want her to reunite with Daniel. I also think it's odd that they would bring Heather back after axing her father, Paul (Doug Davidson), from the show. I know soaps have budgets and must choose how to spend their money, but when people like Kin Shriner on General Hospital and Doug Davidson are cast off so quickly, it breaks my heart a little. I hope the hot new soap stars of the day see how their elder counterparts are being treated so they know what's up around the corner for them.

Heather can battle Sharon and Summer for Chance. Sharon will be preoccupied with her new company, and Summer will probably return to Kyle at some point, so if Heather puts her bid in now, she will win Chance by default. Besides, she can give him the inside scoop she has learned from her dad on chief of police stuff.

Readers, I know it's mean, but I was becoming impatient with mopey Connor. I am glad he's gone off to school at his Grandma Anita's house. I know it was a plot point to accommodate Melissa Claire Egan's maternity leave, so I am sure that Chelsea and Connor will be back eventually. Still, I hope when they come back, Connor is cured. Judah Mackey is a fantastic little actor! He's doing great things in these emotional scenes, but watching him struggle every day is depressing. I hope Connor finds tools at his new school to help him come home strong and happy again.

But Chelsea being gone allows two old loves to gravitate back together again. The only time I have ever really liked the character of Victoria was when she was with Billy. He thawed the ice queen's heart and filled her with light and laughter. I love that version of Victoria. Since Chelsea moved and left no specific return date, and since Victoria realizes she can't wholly trust Nate, I can see Billy and Vic turning to each other for support, companionship, and hopefully some afternoon delight. That's what would happen in Love, American Style, at least.

Next up, a celebration! I was so delighted to hear the news that Eric Braeden is cancer-free! I know that so many of us were praying for and worrying about him; our prayers were answered. Eric! You are loved, and your soap community is rejoicing with you!

His counterpart, Victor Newman, is up to his old tricks. He is dangling the Newman Media merger in front of Adam, Nick, Sharon, Nate, and Audra, all of whom are vying for their vision and leadership to be the winning strategy to gain control. In the previews for next week, Sharon and Nick discuss backing out and letting Adam, Nate, and Audra duke it out on their own. But that's no fun; I hope the whole messy bunch of them stay together in one place because it makes for much more soapaliciousness.

Also, next week's previews showed Ashley choking, and, apparently, Diane saving her life with the Heimlich maneuver. Will Diane potentially saving Ashley's life put an end to their blood feud? I hope so; I am tired of the meow fest. I understand Tucker's frustration with Ashley's obsession with Diane; frankly, he stayed around longer than I would have.

But he's up to something of his own. I just haven't figured out what yet. What are your guesses? Is he waiting for Adam to crash and burn so he can buy back his old company? Does he have a genius idea for Simply Ashley that will wow the world and make them millions? I don't know. I know that if I were Audra and my old boss was still calling and barking orders at me after I quit working for him, I would have blocked his number on my phone by now.

Adam is willing to sell the dirt he has on Tucker to Billy and Jack, but what could he possibly want from them in trade? I guess he wants this to come out to ruin Audra's reputation and get her out of the way, but to make sure it can't be traced back to him.

Across town, Tessa and Mariah fret because they noticed that baby Aria didn't wake up in a thunderstorm and slept through several loud noises. They fear she has hearing loss and took her in for testing. They were told that Aria may have severe hearing loss. But at the end of Friday's episode, Esther was being loud. It woke the baby up crying, so I wonder if we are launching into a story about baby hearing loss or if it's already over. I hope it's not because I think it could be a compelling story about a mother who is a singer having a child who can't hear her music. I know that Cait Fairbanks and Camryn Grimes could play the heck out of that storyline. I am curious to see what comes next!

What will happen tomorrow, dear readers? Will Audra keep running to Victor to tattle on people? Will Victor's taking Audra under his wing to mentor her turn into him having an affair with her and crushing Nikki? Will Elena ever get a storyline more than her looking at Nate with rage? Like maybe a new man who deserves her?

Will Sally learn not to trust jobs that the Newman men offer her and just go back to Chloe, where it's safe? Will Nick and Adam continue to bond as brothers, or are they doomed to be set up as rivals for control of Newman Media? Will Jack and Billy use Adam's info to take down Tucker and break Ashley's heart? Will Adam sleep with Audra to try to woo her into being in cahoots with him? Will Summer steal Chance away from Sharon just because she's Phyllis' daughter?

Only tomorrow knows, dear readers, and I will tune in tomorrow as long as there are tomorrows.Tamilu

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