Meet the muscle

The very best part of having a mob boss in the family must be the ability to intimidate creeps who give you trouble in life.

The very best part of having a mob boss in the family must be the ability to intimidate creeps who give you trouble in life. I bet if I took a random poll of adult women, many would admit they had been bullied, disrespected, ignored, and various other bad behaviors at one time or another in their lives.

I can only imagine the sheer joy of being able to do what Carly did Friday to the crabby country club manager. When Sonny waltzed in with his muscle men on either side and announced boldly there was no problem, he intimidated the offending country club jerk. I think I saw pee dribble down his pant leg. I was so giddy. Oh, what a sweet fantasy.

If any mob dudes out there want to put me under your protection and make people stop being mean to me, I would be eternally grateful. And as an added bonus, like Carly, I am extremely loyal. And blonde!

I want to be angry with Kristina for putting Michael in such a horrible spot in the first place. Her boyfriend Kiefer is a total jerk who was disrespectful to Michael from the get go. But I can't be mad at Kristina because she is a girl who was basically abandoned by her dad. She never had a male role model in her life to show her the way men are supposed to treat women. And thus, she allows men to treat her any old way at all just to have one around.

Kiefer won't listen when Kristina says "No." He slaps her around. He is disrespectful to her brain injured brother. And she lets him do these things. So to all men out there who are thinking about walking out on your daughters, take a good hard look at the road you are paving for them. Sure, Kristina had a great Mom in Alexis, Kristina is privileged, she can buy designer clothes, she can pick any college she likes because tuition is no object, but she has zero self respect because her dad abandoned her and she thinks she is defective.

Mind you, I am not speaking from personal experience. My Daddy adored me and brought me presents home from work every single night. When I got married I was startled that my husband didn't come home from work with a little somethin' somethin' in his pocket for me.

But I have seen the devastating effect of a fatherless daughter. I am watching such a scenario unfold right now in my own family and it's heartbreaking. The kids are crushed and the rest of their lives they will have messed up ideas about men because of it.

I think GH is doing a good job of portraying Kristina's predicament. I was happy that they did a PSA at the end of the episode. Did you hear that number? They said 75% of teenage girls report being in an abusive relationship at some point in their young lives. Take your daughter and 3 of her friends and wonder which one of the four is the lucky one who hasn't been slapped by some horny teenage boy.

Now back to where we started.... The best thing about having a mob boss for a Daddy (even a semi-absent Daddy) is when Sonny finds out that some boy slapped Kristina, Max and Milo will be holding Kiefer down while Sonny kicks the crap out of him. When it happens, I might watch that episode twice!

Dear readers, sometimes I change my mind. Last week I was whining about the karaoke scenes. But when Spinelli sang I Wanna Know What Love Is to Maxie, all my reservations about the storyline evaporated. Bradford Anderson emoted so much during that song they should hire him as a coach on American Idol. It's not enough to stay on pitch you have to FEEL a song to sing it well.

Kirsten Storm and Bradford Anderson just have the sweetest chemistry both on and off the screen. They are just as adorable in interviews together. Their romance is one of my favorite loves stories on General Hospital in years.

When Spinelli started singing, he was scared and timid, barely squeaking out each word. But when Maxie rose from her seat and made eye contact with him, his strength grew and his voice became bolder with each line. That's what love does; it lifts you to higher places. Love makes you better than you were before it came.

The girl group with Lulu, Maxie and Rebecca was another story... It was fun to watch and a happy scene that made me smile. However, there was a weak link in the musical chain. Two of the three girls did great, but one of them really sucked. Afterward everyone kept telling said character what a great job she had done, but didn't even comment on the two girls who sang well! That annoyed me.

When people show up at the American Idol auditions that are just terrible, terrible singers and run out crying after Simon humiliates them, my friend David says "Someone should have told them they couldn't sing." But like on GH, people tell bad singers they CAN sing which they believe and then keep torturing people with their bad voices. And if you are wondering if I could do any better myself, yes, I could.

After Spinelli's romantic serenade, Maxie and Spinelli made a beeline to Jason's for a night of rambunctious passion. We don't know exactly what they were doing, but it was loud. Jason listened from downstairs and appeared horrified. Spinelli blurted out a proposal that Maxie hasn't answered yet, but now that she figured out the clue to Spinelli's "fairy tale" perhaps she will give him the answer we all want to hear.

I like the unconventional nature of their relationship. On paper, they don't go together, but in truth, their souls connect. Oh, that any of us can find someone who loves us quirks, flaws, imperfections and all!

You know what else I love this week - Jax and Carly's new house. Oh man, why didn't I marry a handsome Australian corporate raider? Jax bought a seriously stunning house for his family. Here's hoping there is a happily ever after and a new baby girl for him in that fabulous house.

You know readers, things are picking up. I can't decide if the new writer already started, or if the old writers realized their butts were on the line> Either way, they decided to actually write some interesting storylines, and I found myself smiling a lot this week while watching GH.

I smiled at Max lip syncing for Diane at Karaoke night. I smiled when Sonny took Claudia's hand during the amniocentesis, even though it was fleeting. I smiled when Rebecca went to visit Edward even though I knew she was using him for money, it just made me happy to see Edward's eyes light up. I smiled when Robin and Patrick were on their sofa laughing about their night of Karaoke. There are actually some happy couples. There are positive things happening. I like it when they make me smile.

But now for what I don't like... The Ethan thing is beginning to irritate me. Rebecca has the upper hand as far as I can see. Unless the two of them had some written agreement about their criminal activity, it's his word against hers. In my opinion people in Port Charles trust her more than they do Ethan.

If I were Rebecca, I would go to Nikolas and say "That Ethan creep is trying to blackmail me. I met him on the plane to Port Charles and now he has threatened to tell everyone I'm his woman unless I cough up ten grand." Nikolas would believe Rebecca. Lucky would believe Rebecca. The Quartermaines would believe Rebecca. She has nothing to lose by making up her own version of the story.

I honestly don't understand why she is allowing him to intimidate her. Tell him to go wash his hair and stand behind the bar at the Haunted Star waiting on their one customer per day.

Dante/Dominic... So... I have heard Dante may be an undercover cop and is trying to get into Sonny's organization to take him down. If that's the case, this has the potential to be an excellent storyline.

On the other hand, if Dante is not a cop and is instead some thug who works for the Zacharra Organization for real, it's not a good storyline. That would make Olivia's character an idiot and a failure as a mother and I don't think she is either of those things. I am waiting to decide how I feel about Dante/Dominic until I get answers to my burning questions.

We are anxiously awaiting the paternity test results for Claudia's baby. Since Ric is no longer on GH, my money is on Sonny. But, it doesn't much matter, (Spoiler Alert, if you didn't watch next week's previews on ABC, skip to the next paragraph!) because Claudia is in for a bad week. The baby may or may not survive. Here is the question, if the baby was Sonny's but Claudia loses the baby, will Sonny stay married to her or ditch her?

What will happen tomorrow dear readers? Will Max get over the shock of Diane pretending she might accept a marriage proposal? Will Andrea Floyd teach a class at PCU called "How to Look as Guilty as Possible."? Will anyone wonder how Kristina got a big bruise on her cheek? Will Luke come back home soon so Ethan can go back to being a charming rogue instead of an obsessive stalker? Will Carly and Jax regret the white furniture with a newborn on the way? Will the Quartermaines let anyone with 6 degrees from Kevin Bacon move into their house? (If so I am moving in.) Will Olivia stick with young stud Johnny or give into the charms of Sonny and his magic sperm?