Thanks for making me a fighter

Are you glad that Theresa's back in town? Could that motorcycle accident be good for Ciara? And what will happen when Will gets his memory back? Let's discuss it all in this edition of Two Scoops!

Theresa always has been a whirlwind of drama. A lot credit for her nimbleness goes to Jen Lilley and her ability to swap from doe-eyed heartbreak to diva glare with little more than a head tilt. But if you're not particularly into that manic pacing, then Theresa isn't the character for you.

Which is just fine, because that leaves more for me. I love Theresa. I love that DAYS isn't afraid to show her warts (and makes her pay for them!), but still shows her heart.

I love the banter between Theresa and J.J. He knows when to pick his battles with her. That will serve the young Deveraux well. I love her with Victor. I love that she took over Bella. And, yes, I do give her credit for at least existing in the fashion world beforehand. Eve's brightest idea so far was to have an online poll about which 19-year-old was prettier. So, I'd much rather see this thing in Theresa's hands.

Actually, this whole storyline is bad for Eve. When did Eve become captain of the Fun Police: Judgmental Unit? (That's Jenny Bear's job, thankyouverymuch!) I don't want Eve to lose her sass. She's weepy and pathetic around Brady. (Theresa is, too, for that matter.) I appreciate her being the voice of reason when it comes to Tate. But that's not who Eve is. It's who Maggie is. It's who Paul is. It's who John sometimes is. Brady's got those people in his life. Eve needs to be Eve.

Plus, I miss the awesome Eve and Theresa scenes. I loved the way these two misfits used to have each other's backs -- even if it was reluctantly at times. They should be drinking wine together with Anne Millbauer, not engaging in a love triangle with the Kiriakis Manchild.

But there they are, arguing over Brady. Considering Theresa spent the last year-plus as a sex slave, it's not a shock that she would use sex flippantly as a bargaining chip. But that girl needs some time on Marlena's couch, not J.J.'s bed. (Also, ewww! Bad houseguest, Theresa!)

While I don't think Brady is a prize at all, I do like Theresa in schemer mode. She's a legacy kid and deserves a good place in Salem lore. And right now, it's to drive drama.

Speaking of legacy kids, Ciara's getting the full-on Abigail treatment, and I don't just mean Ben taking her to a jankey cabin. I mean the storyline treatment where we can't unpack any misstep she makes because a bigger storyline comes literally right behind it and trumps it.

Ciara should probably be dealing with her temper. Taking off to angry-ride a motorcycle is a pretty terrible instinct. She should definitely deal with the trauma of being raped. But she's not going to be able to do that because Ben's up and carried her -- swamp creature style -- to another Cabin of Horrors in the woods.

First, was that really supposed to be the same cabin? I'm pretty sure that thing burned down, at least partially. I'm hoping all of Ben's "I know this place" declarations were metaphoric.

Second, damn you, Robert Scott Wilson. I shouldn't find myself rooting for Ciara and Ben as a pair, but I think I am. I know! I know! He's a reformed serial killer and she's Bo ever-lovin' Brady's kid! I shouldn't enjoy them together. But, they didn't exactly suck. I'm laying most of that on RSW. Well, that and the fact that Ciara always did have a special draw to Abigail's fellas.

But Ciara and Ben are both pretty broken people. Some of this is their own faults. Some of it was brought upon them by other people's evil. I don't know how long I'll be able to suspend disbelief when it comes to Ben's salvation. But I'm not at the breaking point so far. In fact, I'm a little intrigued.

LOOSE ENDS: I'm glad Will wants to get his memory back for Arianna. But, oof, I feel so bad for Paul every time Will declares he won't dump Paul. They're like the couple that starts dating at prom of their senior year and totally think they can do the long-distance thing in college.

I have so many questions about Will's procedure. Mainly, shouldn't Lucas be there too? And shouldn't Will be admitted to the hospital to at least monitor his reaction? Or are we just shooting up people with experimental mad scientist potions as outpatient procedures now?

Hope wasn't exactly on top of her game. First, what parent doesn't immediately remember what class their kid failed? Second, while I get where she was coming from, it was not a good look for the police commissioner to go all "drop everything and find my daughter." Finally, does Vic know his granddaughter is missing? Why are we wasting time calling Lucy from church, Hope? You need to call Victor from your family.

I can't decide if Mrs. Jack Deveraux is the exact right or exact wrong person to be judging Theresa for being away from her kid.

Eve's dip into insufferable continued when she scolded Claire for cheating. How'd you get that company in the first place, Eve?

Rafe mentioned that he always wanted kids. Sami's name has been dropped way too many times recently. Sometimes I hate being able to do soap math.

Why has Victor not picked up the phone to call Chelsea about Titan? He's literally scraping the bottom of the barrel to find another Y chromosome to run the company.

Upon hearing the truth about Theresa's absence, Roman immediately took her side. Atta boy, Uncle Ro.

Rafe vs Julie is not a bad match. I almost choked on my water when Rafe dared to lay blame at Saint Abigail's feet. (See: "Gabi's in jail because of Abigail.")

Following up on Tony's update from last week -- Lani still didn't get her chowder.

HOT: Yasss! That recording Brady made of Nicole confessing is finally out in the open. First, I love that Brady whipped out his label maker to identify the blackmail recording before putting it in the safe. Second, the sooner that recording is out, the sooner we can get to the part where Brady told her to stomp all over Eric's heart and get out of town.

Some justice needs to come raining down on Brady's head. Soon. He's still steaming hot mad at Victor for letting Theresa pretend that she's not into him. But, he forced Nicole to do the exact same thing to Eric, and that's okay. Enjoy your stay on the moral high ground, Bradster. Tick tock.

NOT: I love me some Robert Scott Wilson, but did we really need a whole episode flashback of the time Ben kidnapped Abigail? No. The answer is no.

OH-SO-VERY NOT: Damn, Ben. You never, ever tell a woman she's heavy! Least of all one who weighs maybe 100 pounds!

LINE OF THE WEEK: Eric (to Jennifer): "Nicole? You are allowed to say her name. She's not Voldemort." You guys, Eric is funny!

Honorable Mention: Xander: "I'm leaving town." Sonny: "Just like that? No one to kidnap or pop a bullet in?" Ha! Sonny's got jokes too!

Roman: "Brady's got a new fiance now!" This line was not intentionally funny, but Josh Taylor's deliver was right on. It was with the same inflection that I tell my two-year-old, "See, we've got a blue crayon now!"

RANDOM THOUGHTS: Between reshooting two murders to accommodate recasts and that whole back-from-the-dead Halloween episode, DAYS sure is getting its money out of the Necktie Killer storyline.

It's weird that Paul doesn't have more of a relationship with Arianna considering he's been involved with both her dads, almost marrying one.

I love the photo of Steve and Kayla on her desk. However, it does make me wonder who took it.

Should Eric really be working as a bartender?

It's probably a good idea for Ben to carry around his release papers at all times. Something tells me people will be asking more than once.

When Julie says, "I don't want to be an alarmist," I move out of the way just in case lightning bolts can come through the TV.

The Marine Corp knife Ciara had was a nice nod to Bo.

Speak for yourself, Adrienne. I'll miss Xander!

It was kinda badass that Kayla had memory-producing serum just sitting in her office desk drawer.

I wonder if Trent Robbins' aunt is going to come to town to squawk at Julie about what a murderer Nick was?

Phil is a solid name for a fish. I wonder if he had a fake leg?

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