Crime and Unpunishment: Days of our Lives Two Scoops for the week of October 21, 2024

My DAYS-loving mother has always joked that if she ever wanted to commit a crime, she’d go to Salem to do it. Preach, mama. That’s so true. From hit and runs to attempted murder (and sometimes to actually murdering someone), there’s a legal loophole for everything. So, congratulations, Fiona!

Due to Melinda’s impressive legal eagle moves (and some mighty fine zingers slung by the Artist Formerly Known as D.A. Trask), EJ was forced to waive the white flag. He dropped the charges, and Sarah rolled right into a celebrating Mama Cook. Ready for “Two truths and a why?”

One, I know I shouldn’t, but I’m kind of glad Fiona’s sticking around. Serena Scott Thomas is fabulous on every level. Yes, yes. I know Fiona is quite the opposite. She’s felonious and flawed, but isn’t that why we watch soaps? For the wild and the wicked!?

Two, I’ll forever take Fiona over other BS storylines. I meant “B&S” storylines. Any day. All day. Please see: “Serena Scott Thomas is fabulous on every level.” Body & Soul is not.

And “The why?” As in, “Why on earth did the charges not stick!?” Well. That’s soap logic for you. A confession and a straightforward case don’t really mean a thing. Will she eventually get some comeuppance? Perhaps. But not today, justice. Not today. So, again, congrats, Fiona!

Meanwhile, Kristen is using Sarah’s condition to her advantage. The serum for Titan! I mean, why not!? Nobody ever accused modern-era Kristen of being kind and generous. At least this unsavory act is out there in the open. She can also play the “Rizzo Card” here. There are certainly worse things she could do. And let’s face it, has! Will she have a change of heart after a moving speech from her beloved Brady, or will she stand firm?

Also, Xander, listen to your wife. No, really. Listen to her words coming from her face word hole. She’s telling you she’ll be fine without Kristen’s serum. Believe her.

Still, Kristen is facing other challenges. That is, Philip filed an injunction to block the acquisition. No, like Philip in the flesh! John-Paul Lavoisier is back. I don’t know if he’ll be much of a challenge for Kristen, but usually, where Philly goes, a certain sinister surrogate mother follows, and she’d certainly be able to go evil one-on-one with Special K.

LOOSE ENDS:

While I loved that Steve and JJ (JJ!) were there for Faux Abby’s downfall, my heart is completely broken for Chad, who did not deserve what Cat did to him. She even admitted so, and that she has genuine feelings for him! I kind of dig the chemistry between Billy Flynn and AnnaLynne McCord, but I don’t know if things can really bounce back from “Remember that time you were forced to pretend to be my dead wife?”

Still, I’m a little concerned about this mother that Cat was named after. Is this same “Catherina” that is one, supposed to be dead, and two — um, how do I say this — Konstantin’s daughter!? I thought we were done with that guy. C’mon, writers.

Unless, it’s “Kat” with a “K” and that’s short for “Katerina” and the “Katerina” in question is “Katerina Von Leuschner” AKA Carly Manning. Yes, please. Though, I know. I KNOW. We’re not that lucky, and I don’t think Carly had time for a family of four between being buried alive and “Scary Larry.” Boo. Just boo.

In other sad news, Rafe and Gabi’s aunt died. There, there. It’ll be okay. Dead Auntie loved her some Rafe and sent him her engagement ring to give to someone worthy. Hello, Jada, amIright!?

Auntie’s passing led the Hernandez siblings to talk about life and love, and I especially found the talk of losing touch with extended family poignant. I have always been and still am a fan of when Rafe and Gabi chat like this. “Big brother” is one of Rafe’s best sides, and these moments humanize Gabi and ground her again from her larger-than-life escapades.

Though, she might not really be dead! Someone knocked at the door. Is it her, her grieving widower, or Dead Auntie’s son that doesn’t compare to Rafe!?

It certainly wasn’t Stefan at the door. He was stuck in the neck with a needle. Was he knocked out? Did he die!? Given some gruesome news (SEE: This week’s “NOT”), I’m not entirely sure Stefan’s fate hasn’t been sealed (again)!

Brady and Sarah’s scenes were all shades of amazing due to the talents of Eric Martsolf and Linsey Godfrey! I was legit glued to my screen. Of course, much praise goes to Paul Telfer, too, who is continuing his Tour de Awesome.

I could write an entire column as to why I’ve grown to loathe the Body & Soul storyline. When it began, I was open. Optimistic, even! Now? Uff da! It’s stripping the joy — as it were — out of likeable characters and bending others to its will. The meta-ness of it isn’t even fun anymore. It verges on insulting at times.

This is one of those times when I must remind myself to be patient. DAYS tapes so far in advance that course correction can take a while, but I’d rather that than no DAYS at all. There’s that.

As far as Johnny and Chanel, I can’t. I adore this couple and what’s been done to them is ridonkulous. I’m saving my seething for the end-of-the-year awards. I’ll still be plenty seethed by then. Stay tuned!

My first impression of Joy was “Valerie Malone” meets “Jo Polniaczek.” Sorry if that description involves Googling. I’m old.

I was immediately exasperated by Joy’s stance of “I was only conceived to help the Chlomeister.” That was an obvious avenue the show was bound to follow. Thankfully, Nancy shut that down (again, as it seems like that conversation has been on rinse and repeat in the Wesley-Miller household her entire life). I hope that’s the last we hear of it. Joy being tethered to that perspective will get really old, really fast. I’m optimistic that we’re getting it out of the way now so she can move on to become an actual character and not a bratty cliché.

EXTRA SCOOPS

HOT

Three cheers to Brandon Barash! While my “NOT” is absolutely about his exit, my “HOT” is certainly the gratitude and admiration I have for him. What a talented, talented man. I will miss his performances and look forward to his next project. Thank you, Brandon!

NOT

I’m a worrier. I worry about everything all the time. Being a worrier AND a DAYS fan is not easy, especially around the renewal period. So, I stress when I hear stupid things like Brandon Barash has been let go! WT-actual-F, Team DAYS!?

While I will forever have problems with Stefan’s history with Abigail, Brandon is one of the most dynamic actors in daytime. As a writer, I’d love to write for a talent of his caliber. The fact that the show didn’t move heaven and earth to keep him will forever confuse, sadden, and madden me.

In fact, Brandon’s so good that I’d buy an unknown third sibling. A triplet! Brandon could pull that off. Alas, we’re left to say goodbye and that’s, again, confusing, saddening, and maddening.

LINE(S) OF THE WEEK

“Take your time. Take all the time you need. Sign. Don’t sign. I couldn’t care less. The billable hours are the same.” — Melinda to Stefan

RANDOM THOUGHTS

When Justin offers to pumpkin carve with you, the answer is always, “Yes!”

Seeing Casey Moss again as JJ did my heart some good! It was like reuniting with an old friend. Welcome back to Salem, pal!

I love that Ricky Martin was at Chanel’s fifth birthday party! I’m very jealous. Very!

Okay, Sweetness. I see our amazingly chic glasses challenge is still ongoing. I thought my cobalt blue frames were special until I saw yours last week. You win this round, but be prepared for my counter.

Is it just me, or do you think the show is chemistry testing for Brady and Sarah?

I’m even more upset now! Brandon and Dan Feuerriegel’s brotherly chemistry is off the charts. I will miss Stefan and EJ’s banter.

I keep forgetting that Bonnie and Nancy made nice with one another. I was so confused about why they were so excited to see one another for a millisecond. Or why anyone was that excited to see Bon Bon.

Alex should still be addressing Justin as “I’m Sorry, Dad!” until he’s actually paid for the months of douchery he aimed at his father.

I cheered when Stephanie told Seth, “Well, it occurs to me that you think your job is to know things.” Ha!

Um. Didn’t Theresa and her wig get a sweetheart six-month sentence, or did I make that up while only half paying attention to those scenes?

I’m glad for Kate that Philip is back! She needs something other to do than B&S. I’m still upset she was ever removed from the Titan struggles after Victor’s death.

Stephanie and Jada's scenes make me happy. Steve, too. And a happy Patch Man is always a good thing.

I adore that John and Timothy are sightseeing in Baton Rouge! This is a happy thing, and we need that right now for John. Although, while in Louisiana, I wonder if the Pawn will show his father Maison Blanche!?

Cheers to Limoncello! There’s a reason Stefano loved it. It’s delicious.

Leo has a lot of faults, but I love the fact that he always embraces cake, even under the worst circumstances like failed weddings and bungled surprise parties.

PARTING THOUGHTS

So, friends and fellow fans, that’s it for the week of October 21. I hope everyone is ready for a few Halloween scares. DAYS always seems to whip up a few!

Please feel free to follow Laurisa and I on X (ex-Twitter). Our handles are @LaurisaDays and @Tony_S_DAYS. We want to make sure if there’s news to be had, we can share it with you! Laurisa will be back next week as I’m off to treat myself to a full-sized Halloween chocolate or two. As always, thank you for reading, and “That’s a fact.”