The sixth rule of Sex Club: Don't get busted!

Eric makes bad decisions, like not setting rules for his exclusive sex club. We devised six rules of Sex Club and ponder whether Quarter is really busted if they have a permission slip. Paris opted to move out over betraying Steffy, but is this the end of Paris' slathering fantasies? Plus, do not tell us Katie swoops in and snags Eric from her dating-challenged sister. And Sheila, is that you -- again?

Some say you get what you bargain for. Sadly, Eric didn't bargain at all before he founded the secret sex club between Carter and Quinn. Now he's paying the price, stuck alone, unable to even get a hug from his wife before she's off to service Carter. Ah, but there enters a beautiful Logan sister who is turning everything around for him, and no, it's not Donna. It's Katie.

I'll be furious if, after all the encouragement Katie gave Donna, Katie snags Eric while Donna is busy cleaning her paste brush for her next crush art project. Katie, do not do unto your sister what your other sister did unto you. Eric had better fix his ED if he wants Katie to join Sex Club, because Katie loves her pizza delivery men with extra sausage. Watch out, Quinn. You ain't the only one who inducts young members into the club.

In other parts of this cringy storyline, Ridge is right. Eric makes bad decisions, and the choice not to give Ridge the "full monty" about Eric's marriage might lead to Eric's ultimate humiliation. Ridge rubbed his criminal genie in the bottle, and now Ridge's wish is Quarter's demise. But how is Quarter in trouble if all they have to do is show Justin their permission slip from Eric?

Paris might be young, but, unlike Quinn, she has the good sense God gave her to know when something is too good to be true and when to draw the line before her fantasies get her butt out of a job and home. Besides, Zende did ask her to move into the mansion. For now, Paris is keeping Sex Club locked up in her own mind. Is she making the right move, booting her Mary Poppins gig before it gets super cala fragilistic awkwardocious?

Eric and Carter did their rendition of The Girl Is Mine when Eric called Carter to the house to explain that Carter must never think of Quinn as his. Carter had nothing to say because, just like Michael Jackson, Carter's a lover, not a fighter. Besides, also just like Michael Jackson, Carter already heard from the girl that he's her forever lover, so Eric can keep dreaming!

Eric has no one but himself to blame. His piss-poor planning cuckolded him out of his own marriage. He needed to set down ground rules with Quinn before he started this sex club, and the first rule of Sex Club is you don't talk about Sex Club. The second rule of Sex Club is you don't talk about Sex Club -- not with Ridge, not with Brooke, not with Katie, and not with Shauna, even if she's living vicariously through Quinn.

The third rule of Sex Club is hubby gets first dibs, not sloppy seconds. The fourth rule of Sex Club is you take a shower before getting snuggly with hubby, hence the soap logo. The fifth rule of Sex Club is you never fall in love. The final and most important rule of Sex Club is you betta not get caught!

So far, Quinn broke every rule, and now Eric can't even get a kiss goodbye as Quinn rushes off to service Carter. Eric shouldn't even want a kiss after where Quinn's mouth has been, which leads me to a new rule to the Sex Club -- no kissing anything.

There needs to be a rule about tattoos, too, because, soon, Quinn will have "Carter's Bitch" scrawled across her backside. They are "busted" now, according to Justin, but was this ever a viable situation to begin with? Here is what some of our message board members say about it:

"I find the story potentially fascinating as it definitely portrays trying to navigate the line between what makes this arrangement okay and at which point this becomes cheating. I can also appreciate how the optics of this don't look good: Eric, a privileged, wealthy white man basically demanding a black man to have sex with his wife whenever she pleases..." -- garciab006

"I get it. She's in love with 2 guys...but at some point, she has to make a decision on who to be with. This "I love Eric but I have relations with Carter" is silly. you can't 'love' Eric if you're with someone else. Divided loyalties never work out in the end.." -- soapylvr

"People who truly are in love do other things besides MAKE love. They have quiet dinners. They talk over things that matter to them... AND THEY FREE THEMSELVES FROM OTHER COMMITMENTS AND BECOME FREE TO BE WITH THE ONE THAT THEY LOVE! All I see in this relationship are 2 people who are horny and acting like teenagers because they have Daddy's permission to hit the sheets..." -- Catmomma1

It's interesting that you bring up the phrase "make love," Catmomma1, because Eric asked Quinn if she and Carter had made love. That's the only time I heard it referred to like that, even from the mouths of Quinn and Carter. Speaking of their mouths, they don't use them much for talking. When she brought that idea up to Carter, he laughed at it and took her to his bedroom, which is a crowded place these days.

Will Justin storming Carter's bedroom, dressed and sounding like Billy D. Williams in a Colt 45 commercial, be enough to stop them? Justin looked good, didn't he? And he sounded good, too, like a smooth glass of bourbon when he shut down Sex Club. But who's really busted? Carter and Quinn, or Eric and Ridge?

Eric stands to be humiliated when Justin exposes Eric's penis problem to Ridge, and Ridge will need a hanky to get the egg off his face when he delivers Eric non-breaking news. What I don't understand is why Eric never wanted Ridge to know in the first place. As I said in the last column:

It's a teachable moment between father and son. Ridge won't be a stud forever and needs to know how to handle -- and how not to handle -- it if he doesn't have the stamina to umm, shall I say brush Brooke's hair?

Viewers on our message boards agreed that the main person getting busted is Eric. Maybe some mortifying sunlight on the situation will make Eric see what an idiotic plan this was. Even more idiotic would be Eric kissing Katie. The writers truly will have lost the script if they hook up Katie and Eric after all the encouragement Katie gave Donna to go after Eric.

What was the point of Donna's pining if Katie is the one helping Eric work through his problems? Katie can't get over Brooke kissing Bill, or marrying Bill, or being beneath Bill's bed. She doesn't need to betray her other sister the same way, not after the confessions Donna made to her sisters. Katie knows Donna can't get a man. She shouldn't take the only one Donna dreams of.

Unless -- is this some kind of revenge for Rocco? We know Katie can hold a grudge. She took Ridge from Brooke over the whole Bill thing and was still unsatisfied. Katie, girl, don't hold a grudge. Be like Frozen and let it go, let it go, let it go!

If Katie does get sucked into Sex Club, I won't hate to see Quinn's blue eyes turn raging green when she sees Katie in the living room for evening martinis. Remember, Quinn couldn't stand for Shauna to be there, and I'm doubting Quinn is willing to be as generous as Eric.

In all the Sex Club chaos, one viewer from our message board brought up an important point:

"Amazing how Sheila Freaking Carter is standing in his daughter's living room right this moment.... something VERY foreseeable that Ridge should have Justin watching for ... and should have taken EVERY possible precaution to protect his child and grandchildren from a murderer and kidnapper." -- Sopranojenn

Sopranojenn is right. Ridge never trusted Finn about Sheila. The security at the house sucks, and Sheila is in the kitchen, shapeshifting from her evil fog form. Ridge should have sent Justin after Sheila. Ridge could have followed Quinn himself. Or, better yet, Brooke! I would pay to see Brooke do what Justin did today. As it stands, Steffy is alone against two predators, Sheila and Paris, who are after her man. Luckily, Paris seems to realize it's just a dream.

In Malibu, Paris Buckingham is living in a Mariah Carey song. It ain't Sex Club, but she's in heaven with her boyfriend, her laughing boyfriend. That would be Fantasy Finn Diesel, not Zende. Unfortunately for her, so far, the only way Paris can get Finn is in her dreams -- literally!

I'm not a fan of affairs that happen in people's daydreams, but even if it was a dream, the chemistry popped off the screen between Paris and Finn when she slathered that suntan lotion all over him. I was feeling her fun. Dream on, Paris. It was sexy. "Why stop there?" Fantasy Finn Diesel asked, and I was thinking, "Yeah...Why? I'm ready to tap in if necessary." Will we see more, or has Paris exerted the rare ability on this show to exercise sexual self-control?

I think Paris is making the right move -- out the door. If Finn won't give her a second glance when she's in her sexiest Flintstones get-up, I don't know what to tell her. It's better to take Zende up on his offer to live the high life at the mansion than to anger the slaphappy Steffy by stepping to her man.

Some Scoopers are throwing parades to celebrate Paris' departure, but isn't she doing the right thing by ejecting herself from the situation before her fantasy Sex Club turns into Fight Club versus Steffy? Although, with what's about to go down at the mansion, this might not be the best time for Paris to take Zende up on his offer.

With Paris gone, hopefully, the Finnegans will move beyond the beach and surf phase of their relationship. Finn should remember that he's a doctor, not a beach bum, and Sinn should legalize their marriage. Maybe we'll find out if Li and Jack ever flew home. Remember them? And maybe Sheila's story can move away from Sheila being a human Whack-a-Mole that pops up, scares Steffy, and gets smacked back down.

From the sound of the upcoming spoilers, one day might last an entire week as characters navigate through the fallout of Justin's raid on Carter's bedroom. Katie finally learns about Eric's ED problem just as Ridge confronts Quinn about her affair in front of Eric. I sure hope Ridge tells Eric that Quarter is in love. Otherwise, Ridge will look pretty dumb when Eric replies, "Duh! It's Sex Club, and we don't talk about Sex Club!"

The fab four might get together again. Spoilers indicate that Finn confides in Hope while Steffy and Liam spend time with Kelly. I think that Hope might be a better person for Finn to talk to about bad parents than Paris. I don't think Reese can compare to Deacon, and, well, when has Hope ever been able to live down anything about her mother? This could be a setup for a new storyline for Lope about a mysterious person who comes into their family.

Rumor has it that Lope will have someone arrive and shake up the family dynamic. Some viewers guess it's Deacon while others speculate that it will be Ivy. I would like it to be Caroline, returning from the dead to take Douglas away from Hope. Would you be ready for another tear-jerker as only Annika Nicole (Hope) can sob us through?

There are a few fans who think the person somehow ties into the new love interest for Thomas.

Yes, folks, the conversation Thomas had with Hope last week wasn't just another awkward, stalker-pretending-to-be-rehabilitated fake-out. Apparently, there's a new love interest lined up for Thomas. My guess is that any woman in his life, new or returned, will probably upset the co-parenting relationship between Hope, Douglas, and Thomas.

Let us know what you think in the comments below. We'd be curious to know how you think Justin's report on Quinn will devastate Sex Club, and if this is finally the end of this socially awkward and racially tone deaf storyline. Until we scoop again, stay bold and beautiful, baby!Chanel

What are your thoughts on ? What did you think of this week's Two Scoops? We want to hear from you -- so drop your comments in the Comments section below, tweet about it on Twitter, share it on Facebook, or chat about it on our Message Boards.