Everyone has a Plan B relationship these days

God doesn't like ugly. Neither does Ridge, who nixed Zoe's plan to test-bed Zende before she weds Carter. Zoe only wants Carter because she can't have Zende. The same is probably true for Bill, who fiends for Katie because he can't have Brooke. Get the two scoops on these Plan B romances and how one ''B'' won't let Steffy get off ''stress-free'' on the Bold and the Beautiful.

What a week! So much has happened that I don't even know where to begin. Let's dive in with some breaking news. We've located our third MIA character from the year-end review for 2020. Katie was sighted this week, looking gorgeous in her 1880s meet 1990s attire. In case you missed it, we also located Vinny Walker and Bill Spencer earlier this month.

Bill and Katie have been gone, but we haven't missed anything. Katie is still aloof. Bill is still begging. She doesn't know whether she can trust him, but he promises he will be the perfect man for her. Katie talked to Donna about it, but Donna wasn't ready to be real with Katie. I am, though. I will gladly remind Katie that we've been down this road, and there ain't nothing at the end of it but Brooke riding the stallion while Katie drinks liquor from a broken decanter. Katie, Bill is lonely and horny. He cannot get with Brooke, so you are Plan B, as usual. Accept it.

Zoe's Plan A, Carter, shifted into the Plan B spot when a delayed text showed up on Zoe's phone, letting her know that Zende was willing to take a chance on her -- back when she was not living with, sleeping with, or engaged to Carter, that is. In other words, not anymore, the moment has passed, and Zoe should have stuck with her Plan A wedding to Carter.

But, no. Zoe wants to taste Zende while her main dish, Carter, waits in the pickup window. There's a saying that questions buying the cow when one can sample the milk. Zende blew it out of the water when he let Zoe know that he isn't giving out free samples. He won't sell his milk to any woman dating his dear friend.

Zoe wasn't taking "he's just not that into you" for an answer. Zende is lucky Ridge saved the cornered Zende before he had to smash himself through Eric's wall to get away from Zoe. That was quite a backward jump Zende did when Zoe went in for a kiss, wasn't it? He moved so fast that I thought a black widow had fallen on him.

Zoe warned Paris that Carter would fire her if she revealed Zoe's feelings for Zende, but now that Ridge has read every dog-eared page of Zoe so hard that her spine is bent, she'll be the one collecting unemployment. Ridge is so disgusted by her that he doesn't even like her latest promo photos. Ouch, Zoe. As the meme goes, "You's about to lose your job! Get this dance!"

Zoe and Bill aren't the only ones settling for Plan B relationships. Zende told Paris that he wanted her, but is she the Plan B he's using to convince Zoe to move on? Stay on this page as we get two scoops deep into the Plan B's of the week and discuss why the biggest B of them all might keep Steffy from having a stress-free pregnancy on The Bold and the Beautiful.

Rome wasn't built in a day, and this week, Steffy learned that paternity tests aren't, either. Dr. Campbell can't perform a test until the ninth week of pregnancy. As I waited to see if Steffy had gone to this appointment already armed with a wool of bat from Finn and tongue of dog from Liam for DNA samples, I wondered why all of this couldn't wait for stress's sake. If Steffy wanted to be a stress-free baby-mama-to-be, she should have kept her mouth shut about her pregnancy until she had paternity results and real answers for Liam, Finn, and Hope.

I'm sure the rest of the cliff house gang would love to be stress-free, too, and they could be if Steffy hadn't jumped the baby shark by announcing her pregnancy one day before she saw the doctor to confirm it and learned she had to wait to take a DNA test. This isn't Steffy's first game of paternity roulette, folks. She knows there's a certain time threshold for a paternity test, and it made no sense to unleash the baby kraken on Liam until it was time to collect DNA samples.

Now, as it stands, everyone is on edge until whenever eight weeks are up, increasing the likelihood that there will be stress. What kind of stress is the question. Thomas doesn't appear to want to stress Hope about leaving Liam. Finn and Liam are saving their stress for their post-paternity-test territorial wars. Hope doesn't want the stress of rehashing the problem, and that's fine with Steffy. So, that leaves just one other kind of stress: Brooke, with a capital B.

First of all, Steffy has a lot of gall to sleep with Hope's husband and then imply that she was beyond Hope's reproach due to impregnation. I see it this way: Steffy might not even be pregnant if she hadn't slept with Hope's husband, broken the "one big family" pact, and recklessly gone without protection, which could expose them all to a disease. So far, Hope has gone light on Steffy, but if Hope wants to go off, I suggest Steffy find her inner quiet place, focus, and take it like the superwoman everyone claims she is.

On the other hand, Steffy has had pregnancy complications before. It's understandable that she'd go on the offensive to protect the baby. Hope could sandblast Steffy from here to the labor room, but Hope, who is portrayed as the type who won't harm a child, will most likely abide by Steffy's request to keep things civil. Plus, Hope doesn't want to think about the infidelity, let alone dwell on it, so Steffy won't have to worry about a further dragging from Hope.

On the third hand (for those of us lucky to have one), there is one dragging Steffy can't avoid. Steffy needs to pop some nausea pills from Vinny and buckle up because, when Brooke hears about this, she'll be coming for Steffy like a matriarch bulldozer in just the same way that Stephanie used to come for Brooke.

I know what people think. They think Brooke has no room to talk. They bring up Bridget. They bring up Katie. The way I see it, Brooke has plenty of room to talk from experience. Brooke made the mistakes, but instead of Steffy learning from them, Steffy copied them! Who does that? Who models their mom's nemesis? Plus, Steffy always says she doesn't want to keep making the mistakes of her mother. Well, Brooke is Steffy's stepmother, and Steffy ought to not replicate Taylor's mistakes -- or Brooke's, either.

Sadly, it's like Steffy got the worst of both mothers who raised her, isn't it? She got the worst of Taylor by being Liam's doormat, and she got the worst of Brooke by being his mattress.

This isn't about Brooke's or Taylor's mistakes, though. It's about Steffy's mistakes and why Steffy can't seem to stop coveting Hope's husband. It's about why Steffy had a perfectly good man in her bed, but she decided to screw Liam, her stepbrother-in-law, on her couch! She could have at least used the floor like Brooke did with Ridge in the lab. It's the only considerate thing to do for others who will be on that couch, like Finn and Kelly. Steffy has a lot to learn from Brooke and needs to take advantage of her wisdom, don't you guys think?

With all seriousness, Brooke is going to give me life by blasting Steffy into the next universe, something Hope is just too nice to do. The most hate Hope could conjure up was to almost call Steffy a slut. I hope Brooke ends up telling Steffy that she's just like her grandmother when it comes to needing paternity tests. Sorry, Stephanie, you know it's true. R.I.P., though.

Let us know what you think in the comments below. Are you looking forward to a Steffy and Brooke hoedown showdown? Hopefully, Zoe will tie Ridge up somewhere to keep him away from Carter, and that will also prevent Ridge from interrupting a Brooke and Steffy bitch match.

This week, Zoe stepped up her game in her pursuit of sex with Zende -- I mean happiness -- but no matter how many times she popped up in his face, Zende kept swiping her to the right. Paris surmised that Zoe was being tacky and disrespecting herself, but Zoe was full of snickers and threats. She even had the audacity to call Zende and flirt with him right in front of Paris' face.

At that point, Paris' palm should have relocated Zoe's jaw, but Paris put her own feelings for Zende aside and decided to try to save Zoe from herself. Paris broached the subject with Carter, but he frankly didn't want to hear it. He claimed that it was an adventure to discover his bride on his own, but as Lawrence Saint-Victor (Carter Walton) revealed in an interview with SoapCentral.com, Carter's dismissiveness might be his way of shielding himself from the truth.

LSV's interview gave insight into why Carter, who's been in this situation before when Maya chased Rick, might shroud himself in the fairytale romance and ignore the truth before his eyes. Ridge, however, immediately sensed something going on between Zoe and Zende. Maybe it's because game recognizes game, and Ridge has an inner player detector. Ridge has been in Zoe's position many times before with Shauna, Quinn, and Katie, just to name a few, so it's a no-brainer that he'd see through Zoe.

Zoe was playing checkers while Ridge played 3D omniscient chess. He knew exactly where she was headed that night, even though Carter was expecting her at home to plan their wedding date. While Ridge was effortlessly solving Zoe like she was a Scooby-Doo mystery, I was trying to figure out who lit those candles in Eric's living room.

Seriously, guys. Who? Who did it? At the end of the show Wednesday, they weren't even there, but on Thursday, the mantel and room were ablaze with soft, glowing light as soon as the episode started. All they needed was some bow chicka wow wow music, and it would be on.

I guess it doesn't matter because Ridge doused the whole scene with the light of the truth when he came in and busted Zende and Zoe like teenagers who were playing grownup when the parents weren't home. They tried to swear nothing was going on, and Zoe tearlessly cried that she didn't want to lose Carter. "You don't want to lose him because Zende just turned you down," Ridge reasoned. Boom! Truth bomb going off like Hiroshima.

Ridge had heard it all, and there was nothing the two of them could say to him. Zoe turned paler than a wedding gown, and she rushed to Carter's side faster than the speeding bullet she was trying to dodge. She claimed to be all-in for Carter and that her wedding jitters were gone, but I doubt Ridge really put the fear of a faithful bride into her. Instead, I believe she ran to Carter, hoping to activate Plan B before her little A winds up on the curb, jobless and homeless.

Bravo to Thorsten Kaye (Ridge Forrester), who played the role of a suspicious boss and best friend perfectly. Ridge tickles me. He's brash as brash can get with the dismissive way he talks to people. For example, out of the blue during the talk with Paris, he was unceremoniously like, "You can go." When he lectured Zende and Zoe, he referred to Zende, his own nephew, as "this guy." Often, Ridge will refer to people as "that" or "that one."

One wouldn't think Ridge had a caring bone in his body with the way he addresses people sometimes, but it's that diamond heart he has wrapped up in his demeanor of coal that led him to fight for Carter this week in a major way. I hope Carter appreciates it and isn't one of those people who say, "You're just jealous," or "You never liked Zoe, anyway," when Ridge unloads the truth on Carter.

Sometimes I think Carter might marry Zoe, anyway, but my gut says otherwise. He'll probably dump her, and she'll go full throttle after Zende even though he wants to try to have a relationship with Paris. It will be Nicole/Zende/Sasha all over again, especially if Paris is merely Zende's Plan B relationship to keep himself out of Zoe's romantic reach.

I don't know which is worse, to be in a friend zone or a Plan B relationship. Let me know what you think. Do you think Zende is for real about Paris or using her as a shield against Zoe?

For the Spencer men, it's all about two things in romance -- Logan women and cycles. The Spencer men seem to prefer Logan women. Wyatt has his Flo. Liam has his Hope, and Bill finds himself stuck between Brooke and his Katie. Poor Donna, right? Bill claims that Katie is the love of his life, but like Steffy is for Liam, Katie seems to be Bill's circle-back girl in times when he realizes he can't have Brooke.

Bill has been circling Katie for months now and has reached his lonely limit. Katie must have, too, because she showed up at his office as if she were his wife of 2016, dropping off a gift she'd picked out for Bill to pretend he'd picked up himself for their son, Will. That's something a wife would do for a husband, isn't it?

Katie could have just taken the gift home and told Will that Bill had gotten it for him, but she decided to drop it off personally to Bill. I think that was so she could see Bill and possibly listen outside the door to make sure he wasn't in his office, telling anyone else how much he loved Brooke like the last time she'd been there and overheard him talking to Quinn about it. I don't know for sure if she was doing that; however, Katie's best talent is snooping, and I wouldn't blame her if she was staking Bill out for proof he's changed.

Bill begged Katie for another chance. Katie talked to Donna about it, but did anyone besides me wonder what Katie was doing at Brooke's house in the first place? Again, it seemed more like a reconnaissance mission than Katie seeking advice from Donna, who does not live there. Maybe Katie had intended to snoop around to see how solid Bridge is and if there are any new picture frames lying around, but when Donna happened to be there, Katie opened up about her predicament with Bill.

Katie doesn't know what to do, but I am screaming, "Don't do it, girl!" Don't be a Plan B when he can't have Brooke. Bill hasn't done one thing to prove that he is over Brooke, is done with Brooke, and won't try to have Brooke the very next time Bridge breaks up -- which could be any moment after they erupt with dissenting opinions about Steffy's pregnancy. In fact, I think all Brooke has to do is neigh at Bill, and it's all over for Batie.

Here's what some of you on our message board have to say about Katie and Bill:

"After the 3rd time Bill cheated on Katie, that would have been it. If she is truly stupid enough to take him back, oh well. The first time Brooke and Ridge fight, he will run right to her side if she doesn't hit his first." -- crosey64

"Katie, walk out. You heard this all before....Just walk out. no thinking necessary." -- Teaday13

"I can't help it. I love these 2 together. They have such chemistry. I know IRL Katie should kick Bill to the curb, but... I can't help it. Love HT and DD together. They are magic." -- soapylvr

Zoe's boss lit into Zoe, alleviating her of the cold feet she claimed to have about marrying Carter. Ridge, however, isn't done yet. Next week, he informs Carter about what went on at Eric's mansion, and Zoe has to scramble to save her relationship with Carter. Look for Zoe to lash out at Paris, too. No one goes unscathed when Zoe can't have it all, plus Zende as a side dish.

Brooke channels her inner Stephanie upon hearing that Steffy might be pregnant with Liam's child. Look forward to a head-on collision between the women because Steffy isn't afraid of Brooke. By week's end, Steffy reveals what's happening in her life to her father.

In casting news, Bridget will reappear this month. I love Ashley Jones as Bridget Forrester, but Budge has to be the most underused guest character. I pray that they use her for more than a check-in phone call this time. In fact, I say give her a contract and let her hook up with Carter. I hereby swipe to the left on Bridget and Carter. #HookThemUp!

Bill Spencer will make an appearance in Genoa City. It seems weird, but we'll have to see what it's like for Don Diamont to be in his old stomping grounds as a completely different character than Brad Carlton, who died saving Noah Newman's life. Maybe someone in town will say Bill reminds them of a dearly departed friend of theirs.

Thanks for joining us for another Two Scoops, and we're interested in reading your take on the week in the comments below. Until we scoop again, stay bold and beautiful, baby!Chanel

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