On the road... again!

Brooke wanted to take Ridge on a ride to a wedding chapel, Maya put the brakes on Oliver's sudden stick shift, and, while Wyatt was pitching a tent, we got a peek at what's really driving Quinn. Buckle up and get ready to go past the speed limit with Two Scoops' Mike!

Has your week been bold and beautiful? Did you try to revive a romance by saying "Olive you very much"? Did a stuck elevator elevate your hormones? Did you show you were good at pitching a tent? These and more situations faced the Forrester-Logan-Spencer clan this week!

So here we are once again, Scoopers! We're done with year-end columns and fanciful flights into the B&B that could be, and it's time to get into the B&B that is. And what is it? Well, it seems to be that the wheels on the bus (or, in this case, trailer) go round and round, and so do some of these conversations!

Oliver must be into baseball, because his sudden admiration for Maya totally came out of left field. It was strangely electric, as electric as he said Maya was, when his voice went all husky and he introduced Maya to his stubbled lips. At least it's a conversation we haven't heard before, and it's nice to see he's not as hung up on Hope as he was, but where did this come from? And why did Maya wait until after Oliver put the moves on her to mention she's engaged to Carter?

Granted, Maya had obviously settled for what was behind Door #2 when Door #1 contestant Rick went back to now-I'm-crazy-now-I'm-not Caroline. But it seemed she was over Rick and had genuinely settled into a life with Carter. How is the smooth milk chocolate jack-of-all-trades going to react when he finds out Oliver pushed more than the elevator's buttons? More importantly, given how sleep-inducing the Maya/Carter pairing has been, is there something to look forward to in "Moliver"?

So we come back to B&B two weeks later, and Katie and Ridge are still talking about Katie possibly going back to Bill. Look, giving a child two parents is important. I come out of a broken home myself; I get it. But Katie, please. Giving Will a stable home is not worth it when the kid's father is as unstable as Bill is. Where's Dr. Meade these days? If Bridge reunites, there are other fish in the sea besides Bill, Miss Logan!

But I don't think Katie noticed, since Ridge suddenly busted out some serious Shakespeare rhymes. Our Ridge? The chiseled designer of old wouldn't have known Shakespeare from a Speedo. Katie at least remarked on that, but she was enthralled, since we suddenly discovered she's a Big Willie fan. Hey, why not -- it was basketball that first united Katie and Nick, though we haven't seen Katie shooting hoops since then. "Passion always gets me in trouble," Ridge commented. Ya think?

I still think Kridge is a good idea, but it seems every time I turn around, they're deep in conversation about pretty much the same thing. Brooke hurt me, Bill hurt me, maybe I need something new. A quick touch and a spark or two flying. Even Brooke seemed to feel that storyline record had played enough, because she suddenly burst in with the olive-inspired engagement ring Ridge gave her in Italy to move things along. Brooke turned the tables on their 27-year union and did some proposing herself. Huh?

Even though Ridge has a new face, it's still kind of hard to deny the inevitability of Bridge. Maybe it's just habit. But could Brooke have been more obvious, asking Ridge to marry her in front of Katie? Oh, yeah, Brooke knows that her sister's feelin' her former mister. Did she forget all her fine advice to Hope when Liam needed time to decide what he wanted? Apparently, because Brooke ignored Ridge's request for the same thing and decided to go for the gusto. Will Ridge go for Wedding #8 or tell Brooke to wait?

It was rather amazing Brooke had time to pull an ambush proposal, considering she had to stop to talk to Rick about Hope and Wyatt's trailer trip first. This after Rick and Caroline had a discussion on the same subject. Forrester just needs to install a water cooler for these folks to stand around, and the image would be complete. Having an opinion about a relative's love life is one thing, but shelving everything in your own life to yap about it is a trick B&B really needs to stuff back into the hat and leave there.

That means you, too, Quinn. The most interesting parts of this week weren't her machinations, but the brief glimpses into her never-before-mentioned backstory. Apparently, Quinn has exhibited obsessive-compulsive behavior since Wyatt was a kid, and she even foisted some knock-off gems onto her buyers. Quinn herself admitted she's not always taken the high road where Wyatt is concerned. This is good; we need some layers like that, otherwise Quinn is just pulling stunts with no real reason behind them.

Of course, she'd tell you her reason is Liam. Where exactly is Liam getting the idea that Quinn is crazy? So far, she hasn't been particularly menacing. If anyone knows whack job women, it's Eric, who was married to nutty nurse Sheila Carter, and his alarm bells haven't gone off about Quinn, at least not yet. Do you long-time viewers think the show was trying to draw a connection between Quinn and Sheila by showing us the long-forgotten freight elevator? That's only where Sheila sicced a pit bull on security guard Mike Guthrie back in the day!

Quinn must have studied Sheila's playbook, because she used Sheila's tactics to handle her own security guard, the boastful but surprisingly upright Charlie. What I don't understand is, why is Charlie running around with security camera footage on his smartphone? And why didn't the cops look at this footage when the "thieves" were arrested? That would have been the first thing done while prosecuting their case. Instead, the video sat around for two months until Charlie decided to view it on his own. Right.

After Quinn did her best to channel Sheila by glaring at Charlie in the freight elevator, she then used the lift to lay waste to Liam and his plan to talk Hope out of trailer tripping with Wyatt. Okay, explain this to me, Scoopers: how could Quinn know that Liam would be the first person to use the freight elevator after he saw the silly, handwritten "out of order" sign on the main elevator? And sure, I'll buy that maybe Liam couldn't get cell service in his between-floors prison, but he still should have been able to text!

The dramatic music played as Liam kicked and knocked and yelled, but you know what? I'm just not seeing any stakes here. Every single beat in the Lope/Hyatt triangle is being played like it's some sort of crisis -- much like Leffy/Lope before it -- and it's just not that big a deal. Hope could end up with Wyatt, or Liam, or Charlie, for that matter. Who cares? Then, inexplicably, his lips still tingling from macking on Maya, Oliver decided to check out the fuse box and restore power to the elevator. Really?

Seeing Pam and Quinn lunching, it occurred to me that a friendship between them might be really nice. I mean, neither lady has any gal pals, and they're both known to be pretty intense. I couldn't decide whether their shopping spree was cool or cringeworthy. But knowing that Quinn was only playing Pam to keep Charlie quiet cast a pall over the whole thing. And I suppose it was supposed to. Afterward, Charlie looked like he was about to crack -- and Quinn looked ready to spill the beans herself! Will she?

Finally, Hope and Wyatt should have cranked up some Willie Nelson in that trailer of theirs, 'cuz they just couldn't wait to get on the road again. Hope could have played it on her iPhone, except she chucked it into the ocean! Excuse me? This is the girl who is supposed to be hawking environmentally sound couture for HFTF. That phone is going to corrode and pollute the coastline, and all so Hope could have a whimsical moment? Bad message to send, B&B! Really bad message!

And what is up with Hope and Wyatt going away again? Even Liam pointed out that they just got back from Hawaii. Between those two trips and Mexico, "Hyatt" seems to be bucking for some serious air miles. And I think Forrester must have elves working on HFTF, because Hope and Wyatt sure don't put in any time on it. Then Wyatt buys a spiffy trailer and fancies it up, only to romance Hope in a makeshift tent instead. So what was the point of buying the trailer?

As Hope and Wyatt frolicked along the beach where there wasn't another person for miles (yeah, try that in California), did any of you have flashbacks to Liam and Steffy's similar jaunts? I ask because if Hope was at all conflicted, she didn't seem like it here. When it seemed that Wyatt was indeed pitching a tent, Hope looked open and ready to justify his love. The silhouettes substantiated this, and I guess the takeaway is that Hope finally got to see the subject of her woodsy iPhone photo up close!

So what do you think? Are you feeling Kridge? Does Quinn seem crazy to you? And are you as glad as I am that Pam went a whole week without a single lemon bar reference? Bake up some comments on the Soap Central message boards or the comments section. Send e-mail or leave a voicemail! Or talk about it on Facebook below. Your comments could end up in a future column. Like these!

• "The character I'd like to see back is Clarke Garrison. He'd make a good love interest for Donna. I'd pay to see Eric read the riot act to Liam, Wyatt, and Hope for disrupting Forrester business with all their romantic entanglements, and then ban Liam from the building. This is post 9/11 when security is supposed to be tighter; how come Liam has run of the place? Give Scott Clifton a chance to show his comedic talents, i.e., have Liam do a standup comedy routine at Dayzee's. I'd hire Bradford Anderson (ex-Spinelli, GH) for a short-term role as Liam's partner (they were hilarious together on GH). Wouldn't Bill be horrified!" - Sani

• "Katie really needs to change her locks and get a new home security system since big sister Brooke still has no concept of 'boundaries'. Brooke comes off as being so determined that Bill must return to Katie, not so much for her sister's sake than because Brooke sees it as the quickest way to get Ridge back in her bed." -- Julia

• "I am so glad Wyatt and Quinn are giving 'Lame Liam' a run for his money. After all of his Steffy/Hope drama, he is actually alone. I may not agree with Quinn's methods, but...[they make] Liam put his actions into motion. For once, he actually has to do some work to get Hope back, something he is not used to doing." -- Kandi

• "I am loving the Ridge recast...Thorsten Kaye is slowly but surely making the role his own...and he is more than a welcome change for B&B. I like Hope but I don't like that the entire show now revolves around her. The oversaturation of the character is beginning to be too much for me. I'm a fan of B&B, not solely Hope..." -- Manda

• "For once I'd like to see Hope and Liam get married. Interfering in their wedding more than once is a little too much -- since when is it right to interfere in the private lives of the people that you work for? Is Wyatt truly Bill's son? [Where] is [the] proof of a blood test? Words aren't enough; Quinn could be lying to Bill..." -- Kathy

And now, the first batch of Points to Ponder for 2014!

If an elevator you're waiting isn't coming, would you just stand there and wait? That's what Maya and Oliver do; it took forever before Maya finally decided to take the stairs... "There are always hidden costs with Bill," Quinn warned Wyatt after his dad bought a beach house for him. So true, Quinn -- why are you not in Bill's orbit more often?... Both Hope and Liam have revisionist versions of their tortured history. "Steffy was our only problem," Hope told Rick, clearly forgetting that Amber was an obstacle while Steffy was fixated on Bill; meanwhile, Liam stated that Quinn was the only reason he and Hope weren't married, not factoring Hope's conflicted feelings for Wyatt into the equation...

How nice was it to see that Forrester Creations had some other hallways besides the ones we're always shown?... What exactly was Caroline doing at Liam's house? It's not like they had an appointment, and, despite what those quick edits would have us believe, it's a long haul from Beverly Hills to Malibu... Donna was really allowed to take time off from work because of a broken shoe strap? And, if Pam was so swamped with work, how was she able to take a long lunch that apparently stretched into late afternoon? The sun was setting by the time she got back with new BFF Quinn!

Pam actually got into her past with both Charlie and Quinn, admitting that she had "done a few nasties!" Hmm, wouldn't it be cool if Pam went medieval again, only this time on Quinn for messing with Charlie? By the way, how did Pam not know that Charlie had accepted a security position at Forrester? Did this subject not come up in between baking?... Charlie lamented that, because of what he'd done, Liam had nothing. How can he say that? He doesn't even know Liam! And it was Thursday's episode before Quinn took Pam to lunch -- does that mean everything else that happened during the week took place in one morning?

It was fun that both Pam and Quinn found everyone else in their circle stuck up, but wasn't it kind of out there for Pam to suddenly ask Quinn if she'd ever done anything bad? One lunch does not a confidante make!... For someone who was supposed to be grooving on getting back to nature, Hope sure brought a lot of clothes with her. And if Wyatt was hoping to ensure privacy when he drew the tent, he failed, because their lovemaking shadows would have been visible to anyone walking by. They'd have been better off leaving the tent open and putting out the fire before starting their own!

Well, Bridge/Kridge and Lope/Hyatt may be giving us more of the same, but there may be some movement in the Force on the horizon. Will Ridge accept Brooke's proposal? Is Hope going to come home carrying more than her overnight bag? Will poor Oliver finally get lucky? And will Quinn vs. Pam mean the Battle of the Crazy Ladies? Tune in with us again next week when Tracy will Scoop on these subjects, and I will be back to do the same in two weeks. Keep watching, be alert, and most of all, be bold!

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